Thursday, March 26, 2009

Life is funny . . .

Who would have figured at my age I would be going through heart loss right along with my daughter. Today I let the secret love of my life go (my kids call him Toots) I have loved him more than half of my life - I always thought that when my children got older that we would grow old together. . . well that didn't happen! I have compared most of the men in my life to him - well a much younger him and he does not deserve me wasting another minute of my wonderful life on him, waiting for him to find time to call or fit me into his schedule . . . I've let go . . and it feels good. OK I'm not heartless it hurts and I'll always consider him the "one" but I deserve so much more and will not settle for less.
It is funny how we let, no ALLOW people to come into our lives and "set up shop" in our hearts who really don't deserve the space. Sometimes love is lost and sometime we just need to "evict" it from our hearts!
I heard from Jessie this morning and we were talking about life and just how short it is and how we need to find the beauty in life each day - something to remind us just how truly blessed we are to have family and friends to share it with. I personally like to find something that makes me laugh or just smile everyday . . . like for instance . . Jess is going to France this weekend and I asked her to find a few minutes to sing the following; I see London, I see France, I see someones underpants! How cool would that be, to be in France and sing that catchy little tune . . OK I'll grow up now . . . just kiddin!
Man I would love to be in France singing with her . . . instead I'll have to find a goofy song to sing in my head on the way home from work . . .

3 comments:

  1. If you really think about it, you never reeeally had him. Now you have more space in that big heart of your's for someone that truly deserves to be there, and really wants to be there. I love you! #1

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  2. I agree with the oldest sister.....he had you where he wanted you and thats not to say you did not want to be there....but you are the one what got away and he will never ever know what he has lost. You will meet that one any only...I just know it. Love ya...lee lee

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  3. As strange as this may sound, I'm proud of you. Truly I am.

    The loss is ALL his. Do you know that? I do. Though it hurts to let him go, loving him was not a mistake.

    Something is only a mistake if you don't learn from it.

    We are phoenixes--never forget that. We rise, we always rise.
    Good things are ahead; we just need to throw off what entangles and run forward to meet them.

    I love you,
    the daughter.

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